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Human Boomerang

August 15, 2012

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You ask me if I can get you an extra spoon. When I return with the spoon, you ask me if you can have an extra side of sauce. When I return with the sauce, you ask me if you can have some lemons for your water. When I return with the lemons, I grab you by the shirt and shake you saying, “Would you like anything else?”

If you need your server to get you anything, try to use your small brain to make a list of all of the things you might need so they can all be delivered at the same time.

From → Lame "Guests"

17 Comments
  1. Teresa Cleveland Wendel permalink

    You’re one of my favorite blogs. I put a link on my facebook page and “shared” it on the pages of a few friends. Hope that’s okay. We diners need to be educated :o)

  2. surroundedbyimbeciles permalink

    I’ve always wondered what happens when someone tries to order something that’s not on the menu. Like, I want this, but, instead of that, I want it with this other thing. I hate it when a dinner companion does that.

  3. Jeni Johnson permalink

    You crack me up!!!!!!!!!!

  4. Margy Rydzynski permalink

    Of course, the customer is never wrong. Just a bonehead!

  5. javaj240 permalink

    Sometimes I wonder if their next request will be for a Q-tip, or something equally absurd. One of my coworkers recently had an idiot who asked her for more chopped “oregano” for his potatoes. She explained that we are a steakhouse and do not have oregano; that it was, in fact, chopped parsley. He asked her to bring him more. More garnish! Just when I thought I had seen it all.

    I am convinced that this type of high-maintenance “guest” (or as I like to call them, “only customer syndrome” sufferers) is just trying to get his/ her money’s worth (both what they are paying for the meal and what they are tipping). And they are narcissists. Yeah. That, too.

    The only thing that puts a smile on my face (other then their leaving) is knowing I don’t have to live with them.

  6. Hysterical!! You bring back “wonderful” memories for me!!

  7. I am a Catering teacher and I am very amused by some of your comments, I will be sharing them with my students to see what they think.

  8. That’s why there’s self-serve :mrgreen:

  9. Hahahaha…this is so precious. I worked in the industry for many years before my raging alcoholism forced me to leave the life. I’m looking forward to hearing more of your thoughts because they remind me of the good old days. Great job!

  10. omg it’s universal… all of these scenarios have i survived .. thanks for a great read! and for the visit. Power to the (real) People

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