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In Case You Didn’t Know

October 14, 2012

You order one of our signature dishes then proceed to alter the recipe by adding and subtracting some of the ingredients that are in it because you think you’re the next Gordon Ramsay. After you take the first bite, your face is overcome with a look of disgust. Way to go.

In case you didn’t know, most restaurants put a lot of thought and effort into deciding what kind of dishes they are going to put on the menu, and in case you didnt know, they put a lot of thought and effort into what kind of ingredients that they are going to put into each dish, and in case you didnt know, it’s extremely annoying when you alter anything while you’re ordering food, and in case you didn’t know, I’ve just added some of my own ingredients to your dish too.

From → Lame "Guests"

20 Comments
  1. This is so true, people often think that restaurants are like Burger Kind when you can have it your way. Onion soup without onions please.

  2. Um, I sometimes ask that meat not be included in a dish because I don’t eat it. Like spaghetti without the meatballs. Is this enough of a pain to cause the dreaded extra ingredients?

    • Ross Ramsey permalink

      No, because youre not really altering the flavor of the dish. Now, if you had asked for spaghetti without sauce, and then complained about there being no flavor, well, then that would be a different situation.

  3. javaj240 permalink

    Love. Love. Love.

    We have a new chicken dish at work. Of course some lady HAS to have everything about it “on the side”. Because, you know, she wants to weigh three less ounces in her coffin. Whatever. But, guess what? It has no flavor and the chicken is dry. No shit, moron. Really? Chicken is fairly tasteless. That’s why chefs put sauce and other crap on top.

  4. Makes me glad I’m not picky! And what’s the point of eating out if you aren’t willing to eat foods the way the restaurant prepares them, anyway? Just go cook your own food!

  5. So do you all hate me when I order meat well done? I PROMISE I don’t complain if there’s char – the more the better!!!

  6. i have to admit, i do this with plain mayonnaise. but never on the first time eating. however, the subsequent times i come back i ask for that to be taken off the signature item and it never fails to be so much better. at least for me. I just hate plain mayo.

    • I do it for mayo, every time. I hate mayo! I think it’s a common enough request to not get the “added ingredients”.

      I also recently asked to substitute actual guacamole (which appeared elsewhere on the menu) for some concoction called “guacamole mayo” on a sandwich, and the waitress responded “Sure, I order it that way myself!”

      With the exception of mayo, I rarely ask for changes. But I know people who can almost never order something without a “but can you…” and it kind of annoys me, and I’m not even working there.

      • Mayo is one of the many exceptions for me. A lot of people dont like mayo. Its when they order something like ravioli without any sauce, just plain. Of course its going to taste boring at that point. Or when people order things minus the garlic. I know garlic gives you dragon breath, but thats where a lot of the flavor comes from.

  7. I’d like the Rueben; can I have that on wheat bread, not toasted, not dressing and I’d like turkey please.

  8. Hehe… I always assumed it was all thrown together! ;-)

  9. Hey, you are so spot on. Having worked in, and then managed, a restaurant during the 80s, I know whereof you speak. Keep up the good work.

  10. Forever and always I have wanted to go into McDonalds and order a number 3 (or what have you) but ask for “No bread, no onion, no lettuce, no tomato, no beef, no fries.” HOWEVER in order for it to be awesome I still want to be charged for it. Though I don’t know who that would be entertaining to, just me and the clerk that is in on it cause there is no other way for them to charge me for basically nothing.

  11. petit4chocolatier permalink

    Love it and love your illustrations!

  12. hahahaha! oh that last part is dead wrong.

  13. you’re really funny! (I do happen to be guilty of this sometimes :/ )

  14. celticqueen1 permalink

    Well I live in a tourist town where each restaurant thinks it’s better than the next. Lunch can be just a bowl of soup and a nice Italian herb and garlic bread or a smoked ham cheese and salad sandwich on sourdough bread and please include beetroot in the salad part.. They look at me as if I’d grown horns. Seems we don’t do beetroot, canned beetroot it not called for around here. I didn’t asked for canned beetroot schmuck. Surely if you have a half decent chef he can made some up for the restaurant instead of telling me that something as simple as beetroot is not available. Am I really asking too much to have beetroot included in my $13.50 gourmet salad sandwich?

  15. Lol that’s what ‘ve been told by the chef.

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